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The real reason you don't achieve your goals 1/4

1st in a 4 part series of the G.R.I.T process

You’ve heard it all before, ‘Goals are dreams with deadlines - Goals that are not actioned are wishes’, and ‘Dream - Set Goals - Take Action’.

There are so many variations and you have more than likely gone down this process yourself but then you have hit a wall. You have made an action plan you have written down the step by step process, you are feeling great, you are taking action, you are moving towards your goal and your ultimate dream.

How many times have you begun something then you have just stopped, you look back and think to yourself ‘I’m a failure’, ‘why can’t I complete one thing’. This may be in your business, maybe you have begun a course and part way through, your motivation and interest has just wilted away. Maybe you wanted to lose a few of those extra pounds you have gained over the last 6 months, you started off really well and got into a great routine then something has just got in the way and you have fallen back into old habits, which has left you feeling unmotivated and unenergised.

Then the inner critic creeps in, that little voice whispering, ‘you’re no good’, ‘why can’t you achieve what you set out to do’, and the feeling of hopelessness begins and ‘why me’.

I want to share with you why this happens and make this a pivot for you in 6 ways.

First - Let's take a look at the word GOAL, what feelings does this bring up for you? Does it bring excitement or overwhelm?

If it brings up a feeling of it being unachievable change the word to DESIRE.

The word desire is a strong feeling of wanting to have something or wishing for something to happen. Whereas the definition of GOAL is the object of a person's ambition or effort (doesn’t effort sound like hard work?)

Second - What is it that you are working towards? Identify 3 tangible pieces of evidence that will show you that you have achieved your goal. The tangible part is important, it brings feeling and emotion, rather than just dreaming it by having the evidence (employ a VA, a new pair of trousers, upgrade your car, begin a savings account).

Three - Imagine you have already achieved this goal and get into the feeling of living it. This is where most people trip up as they work the wrong way!

They think that if they HAVE (x), they can DO (y) then they can BE (z). The correct way is the opposite way…

You need to BE to DO to HAVE!

It is at this point people then throw up all sorts of excuses and resistance and it is when old habits are fallen back into and no progress is being made.

By living with the feeling that you are already BE-ing that person who has achieved your ‘desire’, you are tricking your brain and notice how you feel inside. By living like you have achieved it, you then break down the barriers to do DO what is necessary (eliminating the fear and comfort zone) then guess what happens….you begin to HAVE what it is that you want!

Four - From that feeling of the future self having already achieved your goal, ask yourself what did you do to get there, what systems, skills and outsourcing did you do?

Five - What is your WHY behind your goal?

This is a crucial part, this is what will get you motivated in the grey dark mornings or when life just seems against you. You why will keep you going, taking that step out of your comfort zone, the reason to maintain resilience.

Six - What will happen when you achieve your goal?

How will you be?

How will it impact those around you?

How will your life be different?

This line of questioning will make you absolutely 100% certain that you really do want to achieve your goal.

The second part of this 4 part series is looking at resistance. It is the biggest block preventing us from moving forward and achieving what we desire.

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